By Stephen Phinney

Did you grow up in one of those homes where it was “grand central station” for all your friends? I hope so. The absolute best financial investment a man can make is turning his home into a fun and educational place for the whole neighborhood. Bringing disruption to your own home is better than sending your children out into a problematic world where you cannot supervise them. Plus, God promises to bless the family who shows hospitality.

"Is this not the fast which I choose, to loosen the bonds of wickedness, to undo the bands of the yoke, And to let the oppressed go free and break every yoke? Is it not to divide your bread with the hungry and bring the homeless poor into the house; when you see the naked, to cover him; And not to hide yourself from your own flesh? Then your light will break out like the dawn, and your recovery will speedily spring forth; and your righteousness will go before you; the glory of the LORD will be your rear guard” (Isaiah 58:6-8, NASB).

Many Christians don’t realize this, but hospitality is a huge deal to God. So much so, that He literally mandated it as one of the primary requirements of being a godly woman.

“…having a reputation for good works; and if she has brought up children, if she has shown hospitality to strangers, if she has washed the saints' feet, if she has assisted those in distress, and if she has devoted herself to every good work” (1 Timothy 5:10, NASB).

Our Husband, Jesus, has offered us very specific instructions regarding the motives we should adopt when it comes to hospitality. We are not to be hospitable for any other reason but to qualify our service to Christ .

“And He also went on to say to the one who had invited Him, ‘When you give a luncheon or a dinner, do not invite your friends or your brothers or your relatives or rich neighbors, otherwise they may also invite you in return and that will be your repayment. But when you give a reception, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind, and you will be blessed, since they do not have the means to repay you; for you will be repaid at the resurrection of the righteous’ " (Luke 14:12-14, NASB).

That certainly sheds a completely different light on hospitality. Most, including me, consider hospitality opening your home to family and friends. The word hospitality in the Hebrew means “place of healing.” We get our English word “hospital” from this word picture.

There are four primary blessings that come with hospitality:

God’s attributes are revealed, not concealed. People in our homes see our families functioning not only in word, but also in deed. The best way to reach a hurting person is by action. When these poor, crippled, lame, and blind experience our families working together to accomplish the Great Commission, healing will follow.

1. Opens up a school of learning for our guest. This is where the rubber meets the road when it comes to home education. Our guest will watch or in the case of the blind, listen, to how Christianity really works. For my family, it has given us many opportunities of ministering to others by simply answering their questions.

2. In sharing, our guests are invited into life change. A family should look at their home as a tool to help and encourage others through drink, food, fellowship, and many times, the shirt off of one’s back.

3. The home is purified in Christ. People in our homes notice little things like: what we have on our walls, music we have playing in the background, books on our shelves or seeing how disciplined our children are. When they walk into our houses, they should almost taste the Living Water of Jesus Christ.


Some of the most successful businesses in the world started in the home and oftentimes by families who home educated their children. This means income for the home keeps mom from the external workplace and helps dad keep his heart turned toward home. Men classically have their faces turned in the direction of money and this is one significant way to help dad keep his focus on the family.

Did you know it would be next to impossible for the “Proverbs 31 woman” to do what she did if she had to maintain an external job in the marketplace? It is true; a significant amount of time, dedication, and resources are needed for her to accomplish this feat. This is no ice cream dipping woman being described here. She is diligent in all aspects of life. I am married to one of these ladies. They are hardworking servants of the Lord!

People are rarely creative unless they are given the time, resources, and encouragement to be creative.


Most Proverbs 31 women know this is a duh. A home filled with safety and peace adds healing to each of the family members. The home should be a refuge that family, friends, and strangers can come and be nourished.

Moms in particular are the “doctors” of the home. They are quick to know how to bandage the emotional, relational, and physical boo-boos. As I have watched my wife through the years, I have seen seven primary tools in her “doctor’s bag.”

1. Heart-Healthy Attitude: She maintains a home filled with accountability for attitudes of forgiveness and healing between each of her members. She has an uncanny ability to clear the conscience on a day-to-day basis.

2. Heart-Healthy Foods: As we see in Proverbs 31, this woman has the special ability to plan and prepare meals that are heart-healthy and comforting to the family. Yes, I said comfort foods. There is NOTHING wrong with comfort foods. The tastes, smells, and textures of foods create positive memories that will bring that family together for years to come!

3. Heart-Healthy Fasting: Believe it or not, God created our bodies to fast (withhold from foods) on a regular basis. Moms should work with the heads of the home to set aside one meal a week to fast and pray together as a family. No, the family does not go off in different directions, but rather sits around the dinner table and prays!

4. Heart-Healthy Dental Care: Did you brush your teeth, son? Moms seem to have this special knack to remember to make sure their family is brushing their teeth. She knows that a healthy mouth is a healthy checkbook and dad usually likes that.

5. Heart-Healthy Safety: Don’t get me started on this one. I have watched my wife watch over her family like a barn swallow watching her nest my entire marriage. She is a mama bear out to save her cubs AND her papa bear. With most women, if someone messes with their family, he is going to hear about it.

6. Heart-Healthy Cleaning: I cannot tell you how many times I have gone to put on my shoes and they are gone. For most women, a clean home is a sign of a clean heart. This certainly is the case for our home. We all help mama pick up and put the entire house in order each night before our heads hit the pillows.

7. Heart-Healthy Prayers: I know God has given women a special desire to pray. They remind their children and encourage their husbands to pray, pray, and pray a little bit more. We have literally seen miracles in our home through the years because of my wife’s passion to lift her husband up to prayer. How does she do this? Simple: she asks me. If I say no, well, whose fool would I be? Women can train their men to pray by simply asking them to do it.
When people ask me what is in my wallet, I say, “My family.” I am a firm believer that if the family goes, the church suffers. If the church suffers, the community becomes dysfunctional. After a dysfunctional community comes the collapse of the whole nation, and ultimately, the world.